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speechless

12:57 AM - Thursday, August 28

my eyes are red, my head is spinning, my cheek is flooded with tears.
I'm exhausted because i had not slept in 48 hours. my whole body is aching.

Reached Jakarta @ 8.20 AM sharp. I did not have a good sleep @ the airplane coz my bones are aching. My mom said it's because i stayed up all night at the freezing cold airport. huh...
Reached home around 9, talked to my mom and dad a while and slept for 2 hours. My mom woke me up coz I promised my dad to have lunch together... so we did it...

around 3.30 something I reached my parent's office & went online.
Suddenly, tata bombarded me with lots of questions...
"where r you?"
" Wat's ur indo hp no?"
"how come i can't contact you?"
" me & opa tried to call your house but,how come nobody pick up?"

I just replied her as usual... "hahaha, i'm in my parent's office blablabla..."
then after that, 1 sentence that she typed changed everything.

"i wanted to tell you that... Iswara passed away."

God, i was speecless. I didn't even know what to reply to her. I didn't know what reaction to give cause it's just so unbelievable. I asked her what happened.
He was driving the motorcycle at a very high speed & he bumped into a BIG deadlock container @ 2 AM.He passed away at that very moment. He was even in the liputan6 website this morning. His mom said that his head was bleeding, his cheek was torn & he broke his arm/leg (i can't remember). I still couldn't believe that he'd gone.

I was taking pictures in front of changi airport's starbucks when Iswara was lying on the ground, helplessly. unfair. :'(

Went to Rumah Duka at night with my high school friends.
The moment I stepped into the room. I felt nothing.
I saw his photograph on the table. omg. tell me it's not happening. but that's really him. :'( the coffin was placed behind the table. He was lying inside there. it's not closed yet so... you have the liberty to see him or not to. I chose to glance @ him for the very last time.
I approached the coffin...
I saw his face. I couldn't even recognized it. It was pale and it was swollen.
no more breath, no more heartbeat. he'd gone, forever. I burst into tears...

My friend brought me outside of the room & I saw his ex-girlfriend called D.
She was crying the whole night. We couldn't believe we've lost him.

D talked to me in front of the room when they were doing the praying inside.

"you know what Vick, the first time I met him, we were in your house, celebrating the halloween"

that very second, i cried again. She turned at me and start weeping, again.

Iswara, was a good friend of mine. He was my classmate for 2 years & he was in the same chinese class with me for 4 years. I started crying again whenever I recall these.
He was always cheerful, crazy, happy and fun! I always like him as a friend :)
I still can remember when we skipped chinese class together...
I still can remember the way he dressed & he never tucked in his shirt properly.
I still can remember the way he talked & told us a bunch of ghost stories he had.
I still can remember when the he, dodo & kris playing CS against the girls.

He will always live in our heart. I believed he is be happy out there, somewhere only he knew.
Rest in peace Iswara Hadi S. Polim...
we will miss you & we will always do.

sabbe satta bahvantu sugithata
sadhu sadhu sadhu

Labels: daily blog, iswara, sebel-kesel-ngeri